‘I was in the infamous NXIVM cult – even when I was branded I didn’t leave’
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Sarah Edmondson is a normal working mum. She spends her days rushing around after her sons Troy, 11, and seven-year-old Ace, taking them to baseball games and working on her podcast with her husband.
However, a trace of her former life remains in the form of a pale white line on her left hip, beneath her bikini line.
It appeared on Sarah’s body as part of an ‘initiation’ into a secret women’s circle, where she was blindfolded, told to strip naked and branded with the logo of the controversial NXIVM cult.
Led there under false pretences, she had been entrenched within the organisation (pronounced “Nexium”) for 12 years while it consumed her career, relationships and – crucially – her thought patterns.
Sarah’s ordeal began when she was 28. Working as an actor, she was at a film festival when she met a member of NXIVM, who told her that the group – founded by Keith Raniere and Nancy Salzman – helped members reach their goals while living ethically and promoting world peace, through workshops on success and self-improvement.
Instantly, the idea appealed. ‘I was wanting something more meaningful. Beer commercials and vampire TV shows weren’t going to fill my cup,’ she tells Metro over Zoom from her home in Atlanta, Georgia.
‘Somehow, they made me feel like I was part of a very special club that was going to change the world.’
Sarah had no idea that the organisation behind closed doors was a secretive and dangerous cult that engaged in abuse, coercion and criminal activity – and onethat would leave her physically scarred.
On the first day of the five-day training session, held in a dingy conference room at a Holiday Inn in Vancouver, it amounted to little more than a few videos, where she was inducted into the special NXIVM handshake and told how to become successful in her career and personal life.
‘It was boring and tacky. I was wary about who they were and their credentials. Also they were wearing sashes of different colours [to denote ranks] which I thought was cheesy,’ Sarah remembers.
She also found it ‘weird’ how the group worshipped its leader Keith, calling him ‘Vanguard’ and constantly referring to his genius.
But as the days wore on, Sarah was won over by the self-improvement aspects of the training and by day five admits she was a ‘zealot’.
‘I was inspired by what the group promised to be and was excited to meet so many people in personal growth’, she explains.
With a price tag of $2,160 for Sarah and her then-boyfriend, it was more than a month’s rent at the time, but she threw herself in, implementing what she had learned, firing her agent and getting new representation.
‘Everything that had been a sticking point in my life was flipped back as an opportunity for growth. I was told I had never pushed through my limitations, and that was true.’
Sarah began to feel more positive and motivated, and for the first time in years weaned herself off sleeping pills. Feeling encouraged, she enrolled in further training and started to see more acting jobs roll in.
When the cult organisers realised she was good at sales and recruitment, they asked Sarah to work for them. For every three people she brought in, she got a cut of the fee.
And it was good money – sometimes up to $20,000 a month, though much of it she ploughed back into further training (at a cost of up to $15,000 a course), unaware it was a pyramid scheme.
‘I really thought I was helping people,’ Sarah remembers. ‘I have always been the kind of person to share what I found positive. I already ran a small women’s group of actors who helped each other meet their goals. This felt like a natural next step.’
Over the years, she excelled at NXIVM, whose headquarters were in Albany, New York, and established her own branch – a thriving centre in Vancouver. By 2009 it was bustling, with 80 students visiting a night.
Internationally, NXIVM was also booming, boasting celebrities such as Smallville actor Allison Mack and Nicki Clyne, from Battlestar Galactica, among its roster, and even hosting the Dalai Lama at one of its events.
However, behind the scenes, disturbing practices were emerging.
Some women in the inner circles were put on special diets or were criticised for eating, being told they were ‘indulgent’ if they were not under 100lb (just over seven stone). They were expected to practise daily acts of denial, forgoing sugar and caffeine and told to take cold showers as a penance.
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Content retrieved from: https://metro.co.uk/2026/05/22/i-infamous-nxivm-cult-even-branded-didnt-leave-28396215/.
